Dear Bill,

Your recent musical outing with Ben Folds, entitled Has Been, is a positive delight. I say this without irony. Honest prose mixed with phat beats propelled hip hop to dizzying heights in the 80’s and 90’s, so it should surprise no one that this old magic worked again. I can’t listen to Common People without thinking of my personal whipping boy, Paris Hilton. The genuine horror expressed in What have you done is moving and unnerving. Who knew you could do gospel?

This is a the kind of music I wish I could make. It’s part crank, part neutrotic. Can it be that you’ve only begun to reach the height of your career?

Keep on rockin’.

Your pal, Joe